Monday, December 29

Omega Squad Report 2: Thou missed the Christmas date, you spoony dolt!

Note to self, get new keyboard. This oracle just doesn't fit the job. Anyway, it's your favorite Sangheili, and we have news on the latest and greatest of the Halo community. Now, just in case you don't know, our favorite Machinima Arby 'n' the Chief just had its latest episode removed by this heretic by the name of Mohammad Pabel Miah. This heretic is also accused of removing several videos of popular nature, like Nigahiga's famous How to be Gangster and How to be Emo vids. Why this guy is claiming copyright on obvious original vids, I have no clue. Hopefully we'll get some Intel on the situation so we can bomb them all to human hell!

Anyway, on to the recent multiplayer media. Recently, Bungie has announced that these latest products would be their last Halo products. Once Halo Wars, Halo 3: ODST, Halo: Chronicles, and the famous Halo Movie are released, that's it. Why is this a big deal? Well, coupled with the newest updates, such as the end of Big Team, the resetting of ranks, and the catering to the MLG community, ordinary Halo players have revolted. Bungie had to send a contingent of MLGers and Flamiteers (The Musketeers with the Flaming Helmet) to vanquish the threat of a growing scourge in a Forge game in Sand Tarp. Players, apparently, were trying to crack the coding and unlock Elephants in the Forge list, allowing them to create an army. The result was chaotic. Because the respawn times for betrayals were enormous, coupled with the fact that nearly everyone had Fuel Rods, Gravity Hammers, Rocket Launchers, and Missile Pods, explosions were everywhere. By the time it was over, the players had gained a few ranks, the Flamiteers' helmets no longer sparkled, the MLG players had lost their cocky demeanor, and the Banhammer, yes, the Banhammer itself was lost in the sands. With their inability to ban, the players quickly fled, leaving only destruction in their wake.

Sand Tarp was officially shut down from all Multiplayer assets for 24 straight hours while they further locked
the
coding for Elephants, and a new Banhammer was immediately sent to assembly to be made. Unfortunately, the word got out, and before Bungie could use their new Banhammer, a new torrent of lolcat and porn fileshares, as well as sexually offensive maps had made its way onto Bungie.net itself. It took forever for the mess to be cleaned up. It STILL is being cleaned up. However, now that that approach has been quelled, rumors have sprouted of a new attempted to hax into Bungie.net's server by way of the missing shield doors in Epilogue and Boundless. Bungie moderators are surveying the maps for any sight of the modders, but so far, so good. Now, just because it said that the Banhammer is gone doesn't mean you shouldn't go putting in a Scarab gun in your latest Matchmaking game, folks. Bungie's already made a new one, and anyone that even shows the slightest hint of suspicious activity will be brought in for questioning. Any sign of modding shown will result in immediate banning. This is Grundo, and that's the latest.

Grundo 'Fishon

Tuesday, December 23

Omega Squad Report 1: HEY-LO!!!


Hello to the Omega Squad portion of the Lockout Weekly. This is our first edition. First off, before you're wondering, I guess you should know who we all are, right? First things first are introductions. My name's Grundo 'Fishon, and my partner here is Pata 'Elishon. We take care of all of the matters that deal with multiplayer issues on the grand game we call Halo 3 and all media related content, such as the webwide phenominon Machinima. But, that's not all we offer in the Omega Squad portion of the Lockout Weekly. Let's switch to our favorite Unggoys!


Grundo 'Fishon

Hmph. Finally. Honestly, the Sangheilis hog all of the attention in the OS. My name is Pancho, and I'm an Unggoy. My apprentice, Pikonia, and myself host the more formal additions, where we talk about what's going on here back on the Covenant homeworlds. Uh.... for the greater interest of everyone, can you tell Grundo that I said nothing? Thanks. Anyway.... on to Seg and Yos, our fellow Kig-Yars!

Pancho



Right. For everyone's interests, I'll pretend I didn't hear that. My name is Yos, and I'm the responsible and human-friendly Kig-Yar. My associate, the spoiled Seg, is currently off in one of the space bars. He's never at work. Oi. Anyway, I'll deal with the wanderings of the galaxy. I'll even give you some intel on some past workings on the Covenant. I know a tad bit about the Jiralhanae, since some were drunk and I took a few of their communicators out of good will. Anyway, space workings and intel on our mortal enemies. How exciting is that? .... Say it isn't, and I shoot you.

Yos

And that's our cast! I hope you will enjoy the great tidings we will bring to the Lockout Weekly. Now, to start it up, I'd like to give props to a relatively unknown Machinima. I present: The Spartan Effect!



Enjoy!
Grundo 'Fishon

Monday, December 22

4th Monday Machinima Review - Edition I - ''The Lockout Weekly''

Rtan 'Sansee

Machinima Spotlight: Pregame Lobby – Episode I

Hello, and welcome to the first of the 4th Monday Machinima Reviews. On the 4th Monday of every month, a review of a machinima.com is posted. The machinima will also be posted with the post for you to watch yourself. Here is a review of the Machinima Pregame Lobby by Harabek.

The Machinima starts with one of the most styled and well cut intros I have seen. It shows each character with their name, and is set to a great theme. It then opens on two of the characters in a battle. This turns to dialogue and more interactions. It is not as humorous as RvB, but then again, what is. However, it is good not in it’s jokes, but in it’s real characters and parts that actually have you sitting up going WOW! GO GO GO! In a part that shouldn’t be that tense. It does move along a little too slow, like some others, but has unique personalities that differ well. (It has a Rube Goldberg machine too x-D).

Our main character is very pleasant, and it is nice to have actors who are not over the top or retardedly ridiculous all the time. Overall, it is a fun show and worth your time to watch. 8.5/10.

Safe for Parents Rating: Intermediate





Sunday, December 14

First Post!!!!

Hello, and welcome to the new home of The Lockout Weekly. Formerly of Halopedia. As of today, I will post each of my archived stories, one a day, until they are all up. After that, starting on the following Saturday, I will post one story every saturday. Please make sure to look for it!

Thanks, Cairo and the Lockout Weekly team.