Omega Squad Report 11: Unngoy Underdogs in Grifball Finals!

I was shocked, to be sure, but they did it. My species got into the Grifball finals! In case you're suffering from a recent head injury and don't remember me, it's Pancho! Sorry for the lack of updates by our favorite Sangheili, but he's currently tied up with matters concerning a Twilight Halo crossover.

Anyway, ever since its humble origins back on Earth when the UNSC was just starting out, Grifball had grown into a phenomenon everyone had heard about, and most people enjoyed it. Of course, every sport had its critics, but Grifball was hailed as the most popular sport, primarily due to the inability to suffer fatal injury. A few bruises, maybe a burn mark or two, but otherwise you're unscathed. Isn't that a bargain!?

Anyway, ever since the forming of the UNSC (the 2nd one; see previous posts for details), Unggoys, Kig-Yars, Mgalekgolos, and Yanme'es have joined in the craze. The Unggoy Underdogs, which were highly underrated and expected to be eliminated in the first few matches, recently defeated the Mgalekgolo Maulers and earned itself in the finals with the Chief Champions. This renowned Spartan group, which all pay tribute to the fallen de-- I mean Spartan Master Chief, is fabled to have never lost a Grifball match. Now, matched against the formidable Unggoys, some predict that their seven year reign may very well end.

Now, to all that are unfamiliar with the sport, it is very simple. It resembles the old sport Football where people had to bring a ball to the opposing side's goal. However, instead of randomly tackling the opposition like a bunch of cudgels, you have stunning swords and modified Gravity Hammers to eliminate the opponents. Anyone can become the ball carrier, and the ball carrier respectively becomes orange for... some reason. People say it has something to do with some Spartan called Grif, though no one was quite sure. Anyway, the ball, which, for some unknown reason explodes when you score, must be brought to the enemy side to score. The team that scores the most points in the two minutes is the victor. Many had expected the Unggoy Underdogs to falter against the Yanme'e team Fighting Fliers, though they, for some odd reason, succeeded against them.

The Unggoys then performed their task well, defeating the Spiteful Spartans, the Safeguard Sangheilis, the Killer Kig'Yars, and the Mournful Marines. Making it to the finals after their heroic, and quite anti-climatic victory over the Mgalekgolo Maulers in a score of 7,777,777 to 7 (The Unggoys were obviously the 7,777,777.), their highly anticipated battle between them and the Chief Champions is the second most famous anticipated Grifball match in history just falling beneath the match between the Sarge's Stranglers and the O'Malley Manglers.

If you need me, I'll be getting some tickets for tonight's match. Can't wait to see ya there!

Go Unggoys!

Pancho

Omega Squad Report 10: Machinima: The Movie!

After what I am sure was an eternity, this is Yos here. The Kig-Yars are in 'da house!

Anyway, Seg's off playing something called Poker over at New Harvest, so I have to be the one to tell the story. *ahem*

To any of those who are not familiar with the term, Machinima is a term used to define video game footage portrayed in a cinematic experience. There are many kinds of Machinima, including Machinima made to tell exactly what Machinima is. Since the creation, there have been many Machinima movies, Machinima drama, Machinima comedy, and other kinds of various Machinima that it would take forever to list them all.

Now, back to my point. Over here on Earth at exactly March 7, 2554, we bear witness to the unveiling of a new movie that had been lost for over five centuries: Machinima: The Movie!!! Now, you're probably wondering what it is, right? According to the description, nearly every single Machinimator back in 2009 had banded together to create the ultimate Machinima. It was the greatest thing ever created, getting into cinema five days after its release on Machinima.com. The reaction: Oscars for nearly everything! Everyone loved the movie and it was hailed as breakthrough in theatrical entertainment. Well, it WOULD have been a theatrical breakthrough.

Unfortunately for Machinima.com and all of the hardworking Machinimators, Machinima.com and the movie's writers were sued by Sony, Microsoft, Nintendo, Bungie, Infinity Ward, Epic Games, Rockstar, Lionhead Studios, Bethesda Studios, Guerrilla Games, and various other companies for their illegal use of video games, including Halo 3, Call of Duty 5, Gears of War 2, Grand Theft Auto IV, Fallout 3, Fable 2, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, and Killzone 2. The result was catastrophic, with a five year trial causing the great Movie Depression of 2014. Machinima in general was forever banned, Machinima.com was disbanded, and famous Machinimators were persecuted for the creation of the project.

However, the people revolted. Machinima was originally a non-profit organization, and the fact that it had been released in Movie Theaters was by way of a typing error (later on, 49 Aqua Mentor of Installation 03 confirmed that it was, in fact, a typing error that caused it to become a movie) and lashed out at video gaming developers. By then, gaming had became so profitable a community that these companies hired their own mercenaries to defend their stores and workplaces. The civilians, in return, hijacked tanks, planes, and naval units, and the great Video Game War had begun.

At the end, the UNSC (Union of Nations and Specific Civilizations) and the UNSC (United Military Space Command) were left as the only remaining governments. Nearly every smaller country was conquered and destroyed in the crossfire, and several video game developers had been destroyed, including powerhouses Sony, Nintendo, Microsoft, and Sega. Video gaming had been brought to an abrupt halt, as did Machinimating. However, with them gone and the new Extravagant Nation of Interstellar Excitement (E.N.I.X.) heading all entertainment productions, the laws of these complications were dropped, and Enix welcomed the new Machinimating movie into theaters. Now I know what you're thinking: What was the plot? It's very simple.

One ordinary afternoon, Master Chief and the Arbiter are casually playing Halo 3 in Jon's apartment when they are matched up with Phil, Zack, and Wally. Master Chief is instantly intrigued by Zack's offer to team up to get achievements, while the Arbiter and Phil are naturally disgusted. They are then matched up with xDragonW0lf and an unknown green Spartan, whose gamertag was mysteriously whited out. In the middle of performing the achievement Maybe Next Time Buddy, the green Spartan, who reveals himself as CMNeir of Halo 3 Tricks, stops them and tells them that they were about to perform the Trick of Legends. Master Chief, who is as stupid as he is eager, continues with it but messes up the glitch. The players are then warped to Weather Station Z 41, where they interrupt a forecast being done by Craig and Eugene. The denizens of Weather Station Z 41 bicker with these newcomers until John, Vincent, and Travis, which have oddly been matched into the game, come in. Soon after, Mike, Brandon, Rachel, Jessica, Rob, Matt, and Silent Pete are also matched into the game, crashing in. The teams enter into a stalemate, but it is instantly interrupted by the combined forces of XxXsMok3w33d4LyPh3420xXx, White Haven, Commander Melander, Timmy, Clan Macho, and a random Katana noob. Before the sides engage in a fierce battle, Spriggs, on his Mongoose, comes speeding past, with the pursuing force of Willy, who is in turn being followed by a fleeing Rogir and Triple M, who is in turn being pursued by the aliens and Hammer, who is in turn being pursued by Vollin and her forces, who is in turn being pursued by the Rainbow Squad, who are in turn being pursued by the Pink Squad, who are in turn being followed by Meme. The random Katana noob is splattered, but is immediately substituted by Vollin and the Pink Squad. The antagonists are then confronted by Ratri (not a typo) and an evil glitcher, all lead by the evil mastermind DippyDoDa, who offer the antagonists a way to completely rule the Halo universe. After they leave, though, they release a time warp sending Shiek, Cid, Herman, Miller, Cooper, Jackson, and various others to them, as well as a contingent of Phantoms, Pelicans, and a map. Together, they set off to find the Legendary Gaming Glitch and prevent it from falling into the hands of their evil rivals. Along the way, they find new allies, recruit new soldiers, and stop their greatest foes from performing the glitch that would forever destroy gaming as we know it. However, what seems like a simple mission elaborates into more than that when the newest allies, those in particular Caboose, bring another whose actions are more malevolent than merely ruling the gaming world.

Simple, huh? I'll see you at the theaters, gents!

Omega Squad Report 9: Sandbox: Foundry Future or Big Team Blowout?

I have braved the depths of which no Sangheili had ever ventured.

I have traversed and mapped the most treacherous deserts, descended to the darkest crypts, and ascended to the heavens above.

I have fought against watchtowers and other worthy claimers of the title Forge King.

Who am I? I am Grundo 'Fishon. Hi, everyone!



Anyway, you've probably heard of Sandbox, right? It's supposed to be a Foundry in Sandtrap form, which seems to being really retarded to some people. However, is that true? Is this really a Big Team Blunder, another map whose sole purpose of notable combat relies on the now-dead playlist?

Well, let's look at it, shall we?



First off, you don't have the top layer to work with, which is already expansive. The top layer, which most people usually see of Sandbox, is literally a bunch of Forerunner Forgable objects. It is actually recommended to move all of the stuff you don't want, should you want to make a set for the greatest CTF or the most epic Infection game ever, you should just throw it somewhere to take care of it later.

However, you should mind where you throw your trash. Sandbox is bordered by menacing watchtowers managed by the Guardians themselves. Should you tarry too far into the dusty hills above, they shall look into the heart of scenery and forger alike.

And what will they do?


Anyway, since you're well aware of the consquences of failure, let's move on to the darkest depths. If you remember Sandtrap's small passages within the structures buried in the sand, then you'll have an idea of what the Crypt is. However, what IS the Crypt?

That's simple enough to answer. Those passages in Sandtrap, only they're as large as the entire ******* Foundry map!!! Is that enough for you to know? How about the fact that it's completely made with Grifball in mind, which means that soon enough, you'll be playing your favorite game of smacking Grifs and bombing bases right in the heart of the Forger paradise.

That enough for you? Well, it is about the size of Foundry, which means that, in essence, it IS Foundry. Never again will you be plagued by the need to go from separate map to separate map if you specifically need Foundry for your baes, as now Foundry is right underneath your feet.

How do you get here, you ask? In the center of the Sandbox, you'll find a large, about medium-sized Forgable block. Delete it, move it, bomb it, it doesn't matter. Below it lies the Crypt.



Now, what are the heavens above? They are the Sky Bubble!

... Ok, I'm well aware that the Sky Bubble is arguably the dumbest name ever concieved for this, but here's why. You know Guardian, Blackout, all of those special maps that have the bottomless pit of despair looming its large fog over you. Well, now you have it, minus the fog. Venture high above Sandtrap to find this griddy piece of art, and I mean griddy. Like the Crypt, the Sky Bubble has a grid made to help line up things. Here, you can make your very own floating paradise.

... Just don't fall. The first floating object you make creates the Death Barrier, so for any saps that feel like free-falling, you're not getting up when you hit the bottom... Hypothetically saying that you actually hit the bottom.



After reviewing the facts, what is it? Sandbox is more than the spiritual successor to Foundry. It is the newest love for all Forgers, Machinimators, and Matchmakers alike. With all of the places linked via a teleporter, you could have a game of Shotty Snipers in the heavens above, a game of Sandtrap Heavies readied on ground level, and a match of Grifball set up... all in the same map! How's that for convenience!

Sandbox gets this Sangheili's rating of 10/10. When you get the Mythic Map Pack, folks, go here first.

That's an order.

Grundo 'Fishon